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Apple Absentia

July 13th, 2011

I have a ton of stuff to post….the words are piled up on my office floor so high I can barely wade through them. In fact I’m so overwhelmed I may call for for a life preserver. I woke up today and pulled a public records request out of my boxers….yes…the pair I was wearing.

Don’t worry…it was on a flash drive.

Have you ever let tasks back up to the point where you suddenly feel like it’s hopeless and you can’t possibly climb back out of the hole you’ve allowed yourself to fall in? That’s how I feel right now with AZ….which leads me too…..

My 10th grade geometry teacher was scolding me one day. We were arguing over a proof, actually a postulate in the proof, regardless, I rubbed him the wrong way. He pulled me out in the hall, cocked his head with furrowed brow and avered, “Son…no matter what you do in life…you have to start at the bottom and work your way up.”
I replied, “What if you’re digging a hole?”
He gritted his teeth, his ears turned red and I spent the final month of that semester in solitary confinement. He barred me from his class so I had to spend that period (school hour) in the library instead of his geometry class.

…back to the present….

I do, however, have a good excuse for my seeming procrastination. Many of the previously mentioned words and documents are piled up on my computer, not my floor. As fate would have it, I find myself computerless…Macless…I have not the tools to perform the job.

Actually, I’m in transition.

After moving heaven and earth to pay him, the mighty Jobs (Steve) failed me. I’ve spent the better part of two days bowing at his brushed aluminum, Lakeside Mall, altar. An altar with snow-white, plastic overtones…elves decked in blue, embroidered attire…cleverly condescending elves, mind you… fact they call themselves geniuses…I have my doubts.

My whole experience at the Apple store very much reminds me of my adolescent, Catholic roots: emptying my pockets; kneeling (lots of kneeling); praying for magical results.

Saints….elves….no matter. Unfortunately magic rarely manifests itself corporeus.

Still I follow the rules.

I tried confession….didn’t work. Neither does Apple Care.

Yet I remain faithful to St. Jobs.

Readers…offer your prayers to the mighty Steve and hopefully I will be back in the saddle, on a stronger steed, in haste.

Now I have to get off my wife’s computer.

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